From, How do I make her stop?
To, How do I stop the behavior AND help her build what she needs instead?
Your child hits you. You set the boundary: “We don’t hit.” They tell you they know, and then the next time they’re angry, they do it again.
So what’s happening?
In this episode, we’re looking beneath hitting and aggressive behavior at two developing skills: emotion regulation and inhibitory control.
We’ll unpack why knowing “hitting is wrong” doesn’t necessarily mean a young child’s brain can access that knowledge in the heat of anger—and why understanding that difference doesn’t mean excusing the behavior.
You’ll learn how to:
Stop unsafe behavior while still acknowledging the emotion
Separate “You’re allowed to feel this” from “You’re not allowed to do this”
Look for the moment the child’s skills actually break down
Use Notice It · Name It · Nurture It to respond
Practice what to do with anger once everyone is calm
The goal isn’t a child who never gets angry. It’s a child who gradually learns: I can feel angry without hurting someone.
Chapters
00:00 Why stopping hitting isn’t the whole job
00:15 Welcome to Little Moments, Lasting Impressions
00:35 “My five-year-old hits me when she’s angry”
01:45 The difference between stopping and teaching
02:12 Why kids hit even when they know better
03:50 “Use your words” requires more skill than we realize
06:30 Feelings vs. behavior
08:48 Notice It · Name It · Nurture It
13:23 The do-over: what to say when your child hits
09:40 The question to ask instead of “Why don’t they know better?”
